I never idealized the West

And none of my relatives, having lived here at different times and built their lives here since the Soviet era, ever wanted to leave.
What idealization? All it took was going online, talking to foreigners, and realizing that everyone has their own difficulties in life. And I certainly didn’t want to go through the experience of being an immigrant. Although I used dating sites with foreigners, that was the easiest way to practice the language. I never considered the US, not since 2006. The only country I liked in terms of adaptation and a very similar climate was Canada. But even in 2009, Chinese people were moving there en masse, and it was clear that very soon it would be an Asian country. I have no prejudice whatsoever, but they don’t fully assimilate.

I have always had one criterion—the language! To read, think, and speak in my language everywhere. Some people are cosmopolitan, but mentally, I need to be in my own environment. When I went abroad, briefly, I felt extreme discomfort even though I wasn’t afraid to speak English. Or to start a conversation at all.

In a word, there is what is ours, and there is what is foreign—and alien.